The Past Month?

So it's been a while..I'm pretty bad at this whole blogging thing. But I guess I have been pretty busy with things. Right now I am sitting in Math Support I'm all caught up in my classes so Ed is pretty much letting me do anything I want. That is why I am on here, I thought I would give an update. I get out of school June 18th which seems so late this year, it sucks. But can I do about it really? I'm just ready for summer to be here, and my freshman year to be over. I screwed up this year, and I really need a nice fresh start. But that's what I say every year, I just hope next year will be different. I'm going to start taking Latin, which I have heard is really boring, but it will help with my spelling, and trust me I really need help this that. I'm also on the school newspaper next year, yay! :) you have to apply and everything so I'm really glad that I got on, I hope I will be able to do really well next year. But I guess we will see. I love Tracy (the teacher who does the school news paper) so much, I have a class with her right now and she's so freakin funny. Hmm what else will I be taking, nothing really that interesting FOS 2, Geometry and all the rest of those things. Just basic stuff that every other Sophomore has to take. At least I wont be a freshman any more. Anyways I should go to my next class, or at least like heading there....
Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

Just A Poem

I thought I would share a poem that I wrote...

It's called Dazed

Your whispers
of worries
cross my lips faintly.

Quickly my skin burns
from the touch of your hand.

The distraught
feeling of uncertainty
captures my body.

I feel a rising hope,
from you.

I leave scared.

My torn mind smiles,
for the mistaken moment.

I know its short but I hope you like it.

My Day

Last night I was woken up by thunder, horrible, thunder. It scared the shit out of me, like not even kidding you. Of course I am DEATHLY afraid of thunder storms, I shudder at the very thought of them. Then this morning I woke up to the pounding of hammers, it literally sounded like someone was hammering a piece of wood right next to my ear. After about of drifting in and out of sleep, I gave up, and woke up. Always tomorrow for sleeping in, right? Well that is if my parents will let me. I spent my morning watching tv shows on Hulu, walking up & down my stairs, and thinking. One of my greatest past times, thinking. Sometimes I think in a way like the way I want to write, how I would describe that very moment, if I were writing. But I never seem to have pen and paper to write it down with. I'm not very good at writing there are very few things that I have of mine that I am truly proud of, but that's ok, because, well, I love it. It has become a passion of mine, maybe even part of my future. Who knows. I sure don't X) Maybe at some point, I will have the courage to post a poem that I have written up here, or even a short story. Right now I am writing one based off of being at the lake with my Grandma. What it is like being there with them for a week or two, without my Mom or Campy, or my brothers. Now I am going off in a rant, I will go for now.
Bye <3
Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

Once Again..

It's been a while I know, I think about writing all the time, but I just don't..I guess there are two big things that happened sense the last time that I wrote, my boyfriend broke up with me, and Marwood Reunion. Ah, my ex, the break up wasn't bad, I mean I wish there were things that he would of done differently, like tell me when he knew things didn't feel right anymore instead of waiting. But that's ok, it's in the past, now I just have to take the steps to getting over him, which I think, are almost complete. All I have left is burning the rest of the things that he gave me xD, kidding, well for the most part. I dont know exactly what I want to do with his stuff but burning it is a option.
Reunion, god it was amazing. I pretty much got to know a lot more people, cried a lot, and had the time of my life. Billions of hugs, thousands of tears, hundreds of I love yous, 50 teenager, 9 counselors, 3 days, 1 church, and 0 showers. Maybe it sounds sappy, or gross even, but I love it, ever minute of it. I came back, and I was in a funk, I couldn't function. I had just spent my whole weekend with people that love me for who I am, and I never have to be anyone else around them, then I had to come home, to high school. Also I spent my weekend with my camp crush, I spent so much time with him, and now, I don't get to see him anymore, probably not till camp. He lives all the way by Chicago, where I dont get to visit as often as I would like to. Which is really, freakin, lame. I miss everyone from marwood, and I have missed them sense the moment I had to leave that church. Even it was a group of marwoodians, I cant believe this coming summer will be my last year, I never want it to end.
Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

Oppsy Dasy

So I slipped, at around 12:45, I was helping a kid out and he asked me a question. So I just talked, but I'm starting over again. I feel kinda like I failed. Oh well, I want to make it the rest of the day. It was weird, talking just comes so naturally I didn't even think about it. I guess that's part of the point of this day. To realize how hard to be repressed and stuck in a corner. Not only is this day suppose to bring awareness to the people around you about LGBT rights, but also bring yourself to a better awareness. Of course that could just be me over thinking things again. I seem to do that a lot. But hey, I made it almost 6 hours without talking. I think I can make it the rest of the day. Well till the NZ party. They are doing a Breaking the Silence party, from 4 to 6. Sense they aren't really allowed to have a party at midnight, sense they are a club for high school students. Oh and if you don't know the NZ (the neutral zone) is a place in Ann Arbor for teens. They have a lot of clubs going to keep kids off street and getting involved in the community. I know that sounds kind of lame, but it's really cool, and a really chill place. They have a LGBT club of there own,so I'm guessing this is who is putting on the party. Anyways thought I would update.
Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

Day of Silence

Today is the day of silence. It's the day when people try to be silent all day till midnight. To protest the way the LGBT's have been treated in the past, and are still being treated. Forced to be quite about who they truly are, because they are scared in what will happen to them. This issue is important to me for many reasons, but of course living in Ann Arbor, I know many people from the LGBT community. Hopefully I will make it through the day, but I'm not one to be silent. So I guess we will see. I'm just glad I go to a school that wont give me issues about doing this. It's nice to go to a VERY Liberal school. I guess that I will post back at the end of the day to tell you if I made it, or any other issues that I have come upon. Ttfn. :)

April Fools gone Astray

My friend told me she was moving today, happy April Fools. This will probably make her feel bad, which isn't the point of me saying this, because I don't want her to feel bad. She said sorry, and I forgave her, and thats that. But it just brought back that feeling of having someone move. It started to kill me. It made me realize how I wouldn't be able to stand to have that happen to me ever again. Once was good enough, and moving once was good enough for me too. I just want that all to be in my past but of course I am only in High School so its not like I wont be leaving soon anyways. Far, far, far, away. Hopefully. Mmm and maybe somewhere warm, I'm hoping for California, ahh that would be just pure bliss.:D :D :D :D At this point I'm just tired and I want to sleep but I still haven't finished packing for my trip to Chicago tomorrow. Blah. I dont really want to go, I mean I want to see my family, I just don't want to leave home. I kinda just want to sleep in really late tomorrow, and ya... I mean it is Spring Break, I feel like it's my right to sleep in, but I know its not. Sadly..
Anyways
Night
Sophia Ketchum Goulding

Is it cliché to have the same title twice?

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I'm a wide, a wake, enthusiastic...repeat...again and again. A camp song sadly enough, I learned it at Blue Lake one summer. Thats exactly how I feel, or should I say another sleepless night...see cliché, right? Once again I am a wake, for reasons, unknown. I hate it so much. Like you have no idea. I would like a full nights rest for once in my life, but no, not me. Rawr. It's 1:29 in the morning. Even if i tried to sleep now I probably, maybe, if I was lucky, wouldn't get to bed till, 2. Which is 4 and 1/2 hours asleep. Maybe I should try? It's better then nothing, I guess. I'm tempted just to stay up all night, but I know I wont be able to do that. I need my sleep, no matter how little that is. *YAWN* Bed time yet? I don't think so. Time for me to get off, ya most likely.
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Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

RAWR means I love Elena in dinosaur.

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I mean things always seem to go hay wire for me. Friday night, my Dad called me while I was at an art show. I almost didn't pick up I wasn't exactly in the mood to talk to him while I was out. But he had called the day before and forgot to call back up. So I thought it was only right to pick up. He called to tell me, that my Aunt was sick, and in the hospital. Sense I've known for a few days now, I'm calmer. But that night was insane. The reason for the title? Well at the art show there was wall of just post it's where you could tell everyone your secret without any one knowing who it was. Well my friend as a joke put I am in love with Sophia Ketchum-Goulding, and earlier I had put, Rawr means i love you in dinosaur. So I crossed of the "you" and put her name in, "Elena." For some reason it's been stuck in my mind all weekend, it's just been weird. But I'm scared to go back to school and face everyone. My teachers, my friends, just everyone. It was a long weekend. I was on the brink of tears almost all of Saturday. But when I went out and hung out with my friends I was happy I did. Just being with them made me feel so much better. Thats why I love them.
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Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

Another Sleepless Night

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I cant sleep of course. This always seems to happen to me. It drives me up a wall it is 1:35 in the morning where I am and I have to get up in about 5 hours in order to go to school. I was sick the past few days but I feel better, but sense I slept ALL day today, that means no sleep for me tonight, which is bogus, and stupid. But there isn't much that I can do about it sadly. ): Maybe after my head stops pounding and I relax a little bit, it will all be ok... hopefully.... I just want to roll over with my teddy bear, Herbert, and fall asleep. My boyfriend gave me my Teddy bear, its soo cute too, I love it. I sleep with him every night, I carried him every where with me at first. But soon people started to ask me what was up with my teddy bear and those such things. I felt like I was a little kid again..hmm..maybe I will do it again. I like feeling like I am 4, every morning I see my brother Quinn on the couch and I wish so much that I was him, just able to watch tv half asleep every morning till he has school at 9. Arg, the lucky duck. I ask my Mom almost every morning too, can I please be 4 again, please? I think we all want to be able to that, not have to worry about things. I hate worrying. It's not fun, not one bit. I am going to once again try to sleep. Sweet Dreams.

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Sophia Ketchum-Goulding

First Timer

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So this is my first blog post ever. I always thought it would be a little weird having a blog showing everyone on the web you inner feelings. But now I kinda get it. No one has to read this, but it's a way for me to tell any one who wants to listen what I am thinking, or maybe I am just thinking way to much into this. Anyways my name is Sophia Ketchum-Goulding and I go to Community High School, the hippie school in my town. Pretty much a perfect fit for me, I mean trust me I am not a hippie, but I do like the freedom that they give you at my school. Its a small school compared to the other public schools in my town, only about 100 kids per grade, making it a grand total of about 400 in my whole school. Small right? And I don't even live in a small town, the other schools here have about 3,000 kids. Which for me, thats WAY to big. But pretty much high school has treated me well besides the few tough teachers, I haven't had to face myself with to much drama. I'm pretty much, still, really close with my friends from middle school. I talk to them about every day. I have two brothers Quinn, who is 4, almost 5 and, Teddy, who is 1, and some months. I also have a Mom, a Step-Dad, who lives with me, most of the time, and then my Dad lives near Chicago. My life has its ups and its downs, but I usually make it through all of it.

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Sophia Ketchum-Goulding